When someone assumes they’re part of the wedding

Top Tip Alert – What to do when someone assumes they are part of the wedding party Oh dear,...

Top Tip Alert – What to do when someone assumes they are part of the wedding party

Oh dear, this one is a toughie. We all have that one friend or family member who just assumes that they are going to be a bridesmaid/Best Man/usher as soon as you announce that you’re engaged. It can be really difficult to know how best to handle it without upsetting or offending anyone. So what do you do?

Do it quickly. The sooner you address it the better as, if time drags on, it will be harder to bring it up and more embarrassing for both of you.

Do it face to face. A text or email might be the easy way out but taking them out for a drink and chatting everything through is much better if they are a good friend or close family member (unless they live oversees of course).

Do it sensitively. This is an obvious one but remember no matter now stressful or annoying it is, they want to be part of your big day because they love and care about you so let them down gently.

Do offer them a part in the wedding. No matter how small, give them a role in the wedding or make it clear that you need and value their support. Perhaps ask them to do a reading, help to seat guests or help arrange the hen or stag party.

Don’t feel that you have to explain yourself. Don’t feel pressured to explain why you have chosen who you have, it is your wedding and your call. Simply say that there are so many people who are special to you and if you could ask all of them you would.

Remember, if they really are a good friend they will understand and get over it pretty quickly.

Or maybe not….


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